The last couple posts have made it painfully obvious that there have been some serious changes in our lives since we moved to Seattle.  Since I’m stuck in Utah right now and don’t have access to pictures from this past weekend’s adventures with Mike’s dad- yeah, I know, you’re sad that you have to wait for that recap, but don’t worry, I assure you it’s coming- I’ll take this time to update you on one major paradigm shift that has occurred during the last 13 months.

Before: Hi.  My name is Aubrey and I was a Diet Coke addict.

After: Diet Coke free since about 4 months ago.

Background: Some people can go out, enjoy a nice Pinot and still be normal, functioning members of society.  Other people walk by a liquor store and all of a sudden they are vomiting on themselves in an alley somewhere with an empty bottle of Boone’s Farm rolling around at their feet.  Those people are addicts.  And while I can (usually) handle alcohol, I had no control when it came to Diet Coke.  If you met me, you know.  My car was littered with empty 32 oz McDonalds cups.  On more than one occasion, servers at restaurants would get so tired of bringing me refills that they would sometimes bring me pitchers.  My 2008 New Year’s resoultion was “No Diet Coke before noon,” and that was HARD to keep.  (For the record, I only broke it 7 times that year.  And at least 3 of those times were because my co-worker’s car’s clock was a few minutes off.  Not that I was counting down the minutes until 12:00 pm or anything.)

The burden of an all-out addiction was covered by the ever-increasing amount of reading I’d been doing about artificial sweeteners (thanks Mary) and the fact that since moving to Seattle I’ve found myself surrounded by hippies who eat real food (thanks Barrie.)  I tried to cut down and drink a “normal” amount of Diet Coke, but honestly, that wasn’t going to happen.  So one day, a little over 4 months ago, I woke up and went cold turkey.  I don’t even remember the date.  Which is sad, because I like having a reason to celebrate things, no matter how inane.

I’ve been clean ever since.  It hasn’t been easy- the first 3 months were TORTURE.  I still get mad cravings when I engage in behaviors that I associate with the crisp, cool refreshment that is sipping a giant bubbly fountain-fresh Diet Coke- mostly things like setting out on a road trip (aka a drive more than 5 miles), experiencing any amount of stress in the morning, or afternoon, or evening, or passing by any Diet Coke friendly eating establishment (I am sadly still proud that if you name any chain restaurant from Southern California, I can a) tell you if they are a Coke or Pepsi restaurant and b) rate their carbonation level).  But I know that no matter how badly I want one, I can’t allow myself even one sip of bubbly, delicious DC, because it’s the first step down a slippery slope that will almost immediately result in me going on a drive thru spree and drowning in a pool of my own acidic bile.