Before I return to the great Panama recap, I’ll give you a quick update on what’s going on back in real life: basically, as I write this I’m in a fairly crappy mood.  Except for a very brief repast of sun yesterday (noon to 4:00 pm was gorgeous) we’ve had straight rainy gray skies for 3 weeks straight and it’s starting to get to me (and everybody else in the Pacific Northwest).  In addition, I had to work over the long weekend, give a frustrating presentation today at work, had to endure a particularly painful Crossfit workout today (seriously, squats are NOT my friend) and get to play referee tonight for some unnecessary family drama.  All stress and no play makes for an angry Aubrey.  Thank god for decently priced Oregon pinots.

But no need to despair, my friends- the funk can’t last forever.  For one thing, summer has to start eventually, and all the weather blogs I read (yes, I read weather blogs, and so would you if you lived up here, so don’t judge me) seem to say that this Sunday is the big day.  For another, we’re firming up plans for another trip to California at the end of June.  While I’d rather not spend the money on airfare, I am excited at the prospect of attending a wedding where I get to wear a metallic silver dress (so what if it’s for one of Mike’s relatives ), visit my mom’s new spiritual healer that she can’t stop raving about (demons begone!) and tag along with Mike when he visits Dwell on Design.  Yay!

And now, to further my efforts in cheering myself up, I present you with a recount of one of my most favorite days in Panama ever.

Even though we had been up late the night before witnessing the miracle of turtle life, we all still managed to wake up early for breakfast (provided by our hotel and loaded up with craploads of delicious fruit joyification) and catch a ride with our bestie William into town.  While Scott and I attended an amaaaaaaazing yoga class at Bocas Yoga, where I was applauded for having the stickiest heart in class (I am weirdly flexible) and heard the phrase “super awesome” about 45 times in 60 minutes (I think everything is super awesome when you live on a tropical island and teach yoga all day), Mary, Priscilla and Kat checked out the city.

Evidently, they also took pictures solely to brag that they both have really awesome hair that I’m incredibly jealous of.

After class, we met up and had another leisurely Panamanian lunch.  This one clocked in at about 2 1/2 hours, but we were sitting on a pier and staring at starfish while we waited.  Priscilla won the contest for most delicious entree- sadly, I didn’t take a picture of her bacon and bean sandwich, but trust me, it was awesome.

With our tummies full of deliciousness, we split up- Kat headed out for some bargain scuba diving and the rest of us headed back to the hotel.  Where we napped.

Napped in hammocks.

Mary loves naps.

Priscilla is obviously the best napper among us.

Naps are awesome.

Once Kat came back and we woke up, we decided it was time to go out.  For realsies.

We started out with dinner at El Ultimo Refugio.  You know how I keep saying service is relaxed in Panama?  Service here was so relaxed that our waiter was openly smoking out at the bar while we ate.  That’s relaxed.

So while we waited for food, we took pictures!

Hair jealousy was still in full effect.

We also drank sangria.

And drinks with floaty seeds!

Cocktails make for more amusing pictures.

Thanks to those Physique 57 classes, Scott makes pink drinks look totes butch.  Obvi.

Less butch, more bitch.

While we waited…  and waited…  for our check, we asked the staff where we should go next.  The response was almost unanimous- everybody told us to go to Aqua Lounge.  “Everybody goes to Aqua Lounge,” they told us.  When we asked how to get there, we were told to walk down the street and follow whoever else we saw wandering down the street.  Easy enough, right?

So we did just that.  At some point, we ran into 3 girls from Buenos Aires who asked us where we were going.  Wanting to look like total locals, we told them we were going to Aqua Lounge- duh- and told them they could follow us. So they did.  And when we saw a sign on the water for Aqua Lounge, we walked in like we knew what we were doing.  And when the “door” was really just a facade leading to a dock with a bunch of water taxis offering to take us to an entirely different island for $1, we got in one as if we totally knew what was about to happen.

We had no idea.  But when you’re on vacation in Central America and strangers tell you to get in a boat, you do it.  So we did.

The Argentinians!  And the boat!

After a short boat ride, we arrived at the real Aqua Lounge- an outdoor club on a dock geared toward Spring Breakers and the hot and carefree.  We totally fit into one of those categories, right?  RIGHT?

Whatever.  We tried.

If hotness is measured in shininess, then Scott and I are burning up.

Love.

Evidently this is what I look like when I get…  tough?

The Argentinians!  Thankfully, Scott and Mary dragged me away before I decided to join them in jumping off the roof of the bar into the plunge pool/hole in the dock like they ended up doing.  Because that’s what friends are for.  (Cue music.)

Other people swimming.

After a lot of sweaty dancing but before anybody did any irreparable damage to our stellar reputations, we found our way back to the mainland, where the ever vigilant William was waiting for us (aka sleeping in his car).  He got us home safely, as usual, and didn’t even blink when Scott insisted on pulling over once on the way home so he could pee in a tidepool.

It was a good day.

PS- Guess what else is a good day?  June 2!  Yup, tomorrow is our 3rd anniversary.  So even if today kind of blows, tomorrow is guaranteed to be bearable.  Happy anniversary to us!

Monday was so action-packed that it simply couldn’t fit in one post, so consider yourself lucky to be getting another one.  Bonus!

After the zoo, Kat rinsed out her mouth (hopefully with some industrial-strength antibiotics) and we decided to check out some nearby petroglyphs we had read about.  It was a short drive from the restaurant where we had lunch.  I had proposed walking, but that wasn’t well received.  As usual, not following my suggestion was a really good idea- my ideas are not very well thought out, and we ended up doing a lot more walking then intended (also my fault).

To see the petroglyphs, you basically drive to the end of a dirt road and walk up to somebody’s front yard and tell them that you want to see the rocks.  We’d been told that it’s often local kids who act as guides, but we were greeted (or rather grunted at) by a pudgy, middle-aged man wearing flip flops.  I tried to communicate what we wanted to see using my mad Spanish skills, but like a lot of the people we met in Panama, I was having some major issues understanding what he was saying.  Evidently the Panamanian dialect did not come very naturally to me.

But even with the communication issues, he successfully guided us on the short walk to the petroglyphs we’d heard so much about.

At this point our guide started asking me if we wanted to see the rest.  Again, I was having trouble understanding him, but I did know he was saying something about waterfalls, and I freaking love waterfalls.  So I asked who else wanted to see a waterfall- Scott and Priscilla agreed to go, but Mary and Kat decided to stay behind and keep an eye on the car.  So we set off.

We continued along the mostly straight path for a few minutes, chatting amongst ourselves and trying to make conversation with our guide, when suddenly the clear path disappeared and our guide started sprinting up the rocky trail.  Seriously, for the next 25 minutes, Scott, Priscilla and I huffed and dripped sweat trying to keep up with our pudgy guide.  It was a a much-needed, but heavily unanticipated uphill sprint.

See my flimsy blue flip-flops?  I told you I was unprepared.  But it was really pretty!

Once we made an equally speedy trip down, we found Kat and Mary sitting in an air-conditioned car happily chatting without a single drop of sweat on them- bitches.  Once they finished laughing at us, we piled back in the car and went back to the hotel to relax and get ready for dinner.

After such an exhausting day, we decided it was time to treat ourselves and headed out to the fanciest restaurant in El Valle, La Casa de Lourdes.  Located in the only fancy resort in the area, we had been warned that it was way more expensive than anything else we’d find nearby, but came highly recommended.  Considering that it came out to about $30/person including generous pours of sangria and champagne, it was definitely worth it.

Sangria goodness!

Mary and Scott!

america's next top models

mary and i had grilled corvina- pretty much the national fish of panama. sooo yummy.

scott had steak. wrapped in bacon, of course. and he marco-ed the shit out of it.

there are few things in the world more entertaining the mistakes that come from using the self-timer on a camera. mary thought the picture had already been taken. AWESOME!

It was a fantastic last dinner in El Valle!  It was hard to imagine leaving this cute little town, but the next morning we packed everything up and made our way back to civilization.  The drive was a total bitch, and may have included certain individuals having to pee on the side of the road while we were stuck in traffic, but we successfully made it to the airport and catch the flight to our next destination- Bocas del Toro!

Ugh.  I really really really hate small planes.

We started our third day in Panama the way you should really start every day in a tropical climate- with a fruit plate.

Watermelon, pineapple, oranges, bananas, and papaya that actually tastes good because it’s picked when it’s RIPE- all surrounding an “exquisite” cheese sauce.  Heaven.  We went through 2 fruit plates at every breakfast in El Valle.

Also heaven?  Fresh eggs that come from chickens that actually walk around and eat bugs.  See how orange those yolks are?

After a super delicious breakfast, we set out for our first real adventure in Panama- ziplining!

El Valle is so small that you can pretty much walk everywhere.  So that’s what we did.

Scott.  Macho.  Obvi.

We passed several houses with chickens happily wandering around.

We saw campsites!  And we were really happy we were staying at our awesome hotel.

We saw plants growing in trees.

And a church.

And naked babies.

After a one-mile walk we finally made it to the zipline.  We met our guides and suited up.

(stolen from Scott)

Butt shot!

(stolen from Scott)

Scott didn’t want to be left out.

Properly outfitted, we hiked to the first zipline, where our guide demonstrated proper form.

(stolen from Scott)

Since I was the resident zipline expert (I’d gone once before in Tulum), I went first.  And I didn’t die!

(stolen from Scott)

(stolen from scott. actually, from here on out, if it's a good picture, i probably stole it from scott.)

Mary!

Kat!

Priscilla!

After we made the zipline rounds, we posed some more.

So.  Sexy.

After ziplining, we had a 3-hour lunch.  Some lunches last that long because the food is incredible or the service is impeccable or the conversation is amazing.  This particular lunch lasted 3 hours because a) the “slower pace of life” you hear about in Panama is most clearly reflected in the restaurant service and b) we ate at a restaurant that was filled with aggressive pheasants who literally stormed our table while we were waiting for our food and amorous ducks who expressed their desire for one another about 6 inches from our table.  (Here we learned just how violent duck love can be.  Isabella Rosselini gives a good description of it here.)

Post lunch, we decided to check out the Nispero Zoo, aka the best $3 zoo in the whole wide world.  Seriously, it was the best $3 we spent on the entire trip.

Racoons!

Giant rodent-things!

Golden frogs!  (The signature animal of El Valle.)

Pheasants!  I think it was wearing a bread tie on it’s nose.

Albino peacocks!  No matter what my hair color may be at the moment, I’ll always feel a special kinship with albinos.

Emu!

Rooster!  Seriously, there were so many freaking chickens here it was insane.  I am pretty sure that we were eating zoo-chicken eggs the whole time we were in El Valle.

The mule.  Kat really liked the mule.  Like, a little too much.  Like, she kissed it good-bye.  But you know, whatever floats your boat.

So there isn’t an animal in this picture, but it will be PERFECT for Priscilla’s Sri-Lankan online dating profile pic!  So lovely.

There were a ton of other animals- ocelots, jaguars, parrots and taipers to name a few.  Unfortunately, it’s midnight and I’m exhausted.  So that’s what you get.

Next- fancy food, more fruit plates, Panamanian Sasquatch and Bocas del Toro!

The recap continues.

On day 2, we woke up in Panama City, navigated the intricacies that come when 5 people share 1 shower and took advantage of the Sheraton’s complimentary breakfast that came courtesy of Scott’s Platinum Status.  Seriously, that Platinum Status stuff was the glue that bound our vacation together- free breakfasts, free wine  and cheese plates, free happy hours- we pretty much took advantage of every possible perk we could get our hands on.  Including, but not limited to, the fact that I may have pocketed a purseful of tea bags when I found that they had Mighty Leaf tea left out unattended.

Yeah, I’m classy.

After breakfast, Scott and Kat set out to pick up our rental car while Mary, Priscilla and I volunteered to lounge by the pool for a bit.  Total team players.

(Do you LOVE my gold Target sandals?  I do.  I will be much happier once it gets warm enough in Seattle to actually wear them up here.  Also, here’s a fun fact: I brought 5 pairs of shoes on this trip.  4 were metallic gold.  The other were hiking shoes.  If I ever find gold hiking shoes, I’m buying them on the spot.)

What was supposed to be a quick 30 minute trip to pick up the car ended up taking about an hour and a half- evidently there was some huge cycling event going on and about half of the major streets in the city were closed.  Thankfully, Kat and Scott’s $2 cab ride included a driver who at least knew the basic layout of the city.  When they arrived and we packed into the car to head to our next destination, the tiny mountain town of El Valle de Anton, we did not have such knowledge, and it ended up taking us over an hour just to get out of the city.

See, here’s the thing about Panamanians.  They’re really nice.  They’re super friendly.  They make good food and are fun to hang out with.  But they do not do very well with directions.  The map the rental car gave us was a blurry mimeograph that only showed 1 out of every 4 streets we actually passed.  We had to stop at 2 gas stations, ask a pizza delivery guy on a moped and stop in at 1 other rental car agency just to figure out how to get out of the freaking city limits.

It was a little frustrating.  Thankfully, we kept ourselves entertained.

While Kat and I tried to get directions in a convenience store, Scott picked out delectable Panamanian snacks.  Like packets of Miracle Whip.  Ugh.

This was also the spot where Scott successfully used the Macro feature on his camera for the very first time.  This would quickly become a theme of the trip.

During our many, many, many wrong turns, we got to explore the city and see what traffic looks like abroad.  (The city’s skyline is actually pretty impressive.)

(pic stolen from Priscilla)

There was also some pretty creative graffiti.

We also got very familiar with the Diablo Bus system.  Evidently, these busses, which sport elaborate murals depicting unicorns, barbarians and manga characters EVERYWHERE- even on the windshields- are privately owned but function as the main form of public transportation in Panama.  During our 2 hour drive to El Valle, we saw about 300 of them, each more elaborately decorated than the last.

Halfway to El Valle, we started to get a little hungry.  When we saw a roadside cafe whose signage featured a list of meats rather than an actual name, we figured that would be a good place to eat lunch.

The parrot joined us for lunch.

Chicken plate!

Tamale!

Chorizo!!!

Post lunch, we packed back in the car and drove another hour to El Valle and checked in to our little hotel, Anton Valley Hotel.

Mary found this hotel and it was absolutely adorable!  We had booked a room that just barely fit all 5 of us for only $70/night, but when we arrived, the owner told us that since they had an extra room free, they would go ahead and give it to us for free.  Yeah, that’s right- FREE!  We were instantly happy.

Once we were settled in our rooms we walked down the street to check out the handicraft market that takes place in El Valle every Sunday.

Mary was in giant colorful jewelry heaven.

There were a lot of Panama hats.  (Fun fact- the “Panama hat” that most people think of is actually made in Ecuador.  Who knew?  Well, besides all of Panama.)

A lot of Panama hats.

Scott continued to master the art of the macro shot. Look how awesome this picture of El Valle’s famous golden frogs turned out!

Something told me that the naked fairy lady paintings weren’t a key element of indigenous Panamanian culture.

I spent a lot of time talking to this jewelry maker and bought my mom a necklace.  (Mom- act surprised when I give this to you next weekend.  Thanks.)

But Mary found the best present ever for her mom- Jesus in a box!

Once we had made our purchases, we wandered down the street to a tiny little restaurant that featured $1.50 beer.

We meant to only have a couple of beers, but then we decided to have some appetizers as well.  And then we ended up eating an entire meal.  It was delicious.

We then went back to our hotel, where we once again set out to have a couple of drinks and ended up eating an entire second dinner.  Eh, it happens.  But the real highlight of the night was when Mary suddenly screamed “BAT!” and jumped out of her seat.  The rest of us proceeded to start freaking out as well when we heard one of the innkeepers laughing at us.  We tried to explain to him that there was a bat perched above Mary’s chair.  He just shook his head and told us that the creature we were scared of was not a bat.

He was right.

It was the biggest, most Jurassic-Park-esque cricket any of us had ever seen.  And it obviously felt at home- it hung out the entire time we spent eating, drinking and talking.  It even stayed and hung out when we moved over the the other patio, where we stayed up late playing Trivial Pursuit Jr. (Priscilla kicked all of our asses) and drinking Seco.  The Seco may have been the reason that it took us 2 hours to play 1 game of Trivial Pursuit Jr.

My two besties, Mary and Scott, have been talking about planning a vacation for months now.  We have almost everything pinned down- time off from work has been secured and budgets are fairly well figured out.  However, there is one tiny little issue still remaining- where to go.

The original plan was Iceland, but I think we’ve all decided that we need something a little…  warmer.  We had decided on Argentina at one point, but then Scott had the nerve to get an assignment at work that kept him committed to stay in New York through March, and airfare went up by $400 or so in the meantime.  Total fail.  However, the world is a big wonderful place and we still have lots of options.  Here’s what we’re looking at right now-

• Peru- Definitely intriguing, but we are worried that we may not be able to do the Inca trail this year thanks to recent mudslides.  Lima would definitely offer some actual city life, which could be a good thing in between hiking and exploring.
• Costa Rica- I feel like everybody I know has been to Costa Rica lately, but they all seem to dig it.  Pros: We could gets lots of suggestions of what to do and where to go; also, it’s supposed to be ridiculously beautiful, it has the cheapest airfare on our list (at least for me).  Cons: Possibly too touristy, more expensive to get around.
• Panama- Mary found this awesome article that describes Panama as a “more rustic” Costa Rica.  I would love to see the Canal and do some island-hopping, but I know absolutely nothing about Panama otherwise- not that that is necessarily a bad thing.

So those are the main contenders- does anybody have any experiences or opinions?  Weigh in!  Make decisions for me!

On our last day in Mexico, we decided to set out for a little adventure.  Just me, Mike, our Dodge Accent and the open road.

Well, “road” may be overstating it.  We decided to attempt the drive to Punta Allen, a tiny (even tinier than Tulum) fishing village about 45 kilometers south of Tulum.  I say “attempt” because every guide book or travel article I had read said you needed a 4 wheel drive vehicle, preferably a Jeep, to make it.  The only route to Punta Allen involves driving down a dirt road through the Sian Kaan Biosphere, a World Heritage Site famous for it’s gigantic lagoon and jungle.  Considering we were driving a teensy Dodge Accent that wasn’t exactly outfitted for extreme conditions, we knew there was a good chance that we might be getting into some trouble.

Thankfully, guide books are full of crap and mostly designed to trick you into paying for unnecessary tours.  We were golden.  And we only got stopped by the Federalis once!

We stopped at the Sian Kaan visitors center.  It was too windy that day to see any real sea life (the lagoon is populated by dolphins and manatees!), but the view from the top was amazing.

I tried to find out if there was ANY chance of seeing manatees without actually going on a boat.  There wasn’t.

So we took a picture on the dock, skipped the boat tour (which saved us $100 and mike vomiting over the side of the dingy.)

And we took off on our adventure.

It was a perilous journey.  But our brave little Dodge Accent made it through the dirt road.

We drove and drove and drove.

We braved the threat of dangerous creatures.

And we only ran into the Federalis twice!

And then we got hungry.  At the Sian Kaan visitor’s center, the guide told us about a little fishing bungalow called Sol Caribe on the way to Punta Allen that had really good food- so we stopped.

There was nobody there.

So we started to walk back to the car.  Then a short American guy shouted at us from the beach and asked us what we were doing.  We told him that somebody had told us to eat there but that the place must not be open so we were leaving, but he shook his head and told us that he was the owner and they were open, but nobody else was there.  Then he asked us what we wanted to eat.

We were a little sketched out to say the least, but Mike asked for a menu anyway.  The guy laughed and said there was no menu- just tell him what we wanted to eat.  I asked what they had on hand and he told me they had gotten some really good shrimp that morning.  I was still confused, but he seemed so excited to see people that we decided to split a plate of shrimp.  What the hell, right?  It was pretty.  So we wandered around the empty beach while he made us food.

Mike found a quality walking stick.

When we got back, the owner offered me a margarita and I decided that he was good people.

Um, if you can’t tell by the look on my face, the margarita was really, really strong.  Like, I got nervous hearing him make it. It was delicious though.)

Later that day I realized that we had basically set ourselves up to be killed in some horror movie universe- we wandered into an abandoned beach shack, some strange guy offered to feed us and then tried to get me drunk.  Really, the day should have ended with our bodies being thrown off a boat out in the Atlantic Ocean somewhere.

Thankfully though, that didn’t happen.  Instead of killing us, he brought us some awesome food:

Alive and full, we set off to Punta Allen.  It was indeed a VERY small town.  But great for wandering and photo-taking.

hehe.

After some wanderings, we headed back.  We stopped at some tide pools, looked at crabs, I peed on the side of the road (thank you mr. margarita) and we stopped on another beach to take a 2 hour nap.  And then we saw THE GREATEST AD IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD:

I have nothing more to say about that, other than it was the perfect end to a fabulous day.

I know I’ve been going on and on about our vacation, but you’ll have to endure one or two more post before I finally shut up about it.  Only two more- I promise.  Then I’ll get back to chronicling our slightly more monotonous and definitely colder day to day non-adventures in Seattle.

When you think Mexican food, you generally think of the typical stuff- tacos, burritos and anything with salsa and guac.  Maybe throw in some ceviche for a bit of good measure and you’re set.  Well, we definitely ate all of that, but we also had some of the best Italian food either of us have ever had.

I know, I know- you’re sitting there thinking “Italian food?”  And you’re probably silently judging us for being the stupid tourists who go to another country and don’t take advantage of local eating options.  (Well, you’re probably judging ME and thinking that you’re still rather impressed that Mike made it through the entire trip without finding a Weinerschnitzel.)  Well, before you totally judge (or just laugh at my habit of projecting my insecurity on anonymous readers), let me preface it by telling you that we had set out to go eat some ceviche on the beach, but our original destination was closed for a wedding so we decided to check out the place next door, Posada Margherita .  Mostly because there was a flower on the sign, and it was close.  We were hungry.

We wandered into a tiny patio in the middle of some beachfront cottages- so far, so good.  There were about 10 tables and we were told to just sit down wherever we wanted, so we did.  A waiter came by a few minutes later, and instead of giving us a menu, he sat down at the empty chair and listed about 5 options.  Once he said “fresh tagliatelle” for the third time, I realized that we had wandered into an Italian joint.  I was a bit confused.  (His heavy Italian accent probably should have tipped me off as well).

At this point I woke from my low-blood-sugar-induced stupor and looked around.  I realized that we were sitting next to a gorgeous wine cellar and were surrounded by older couples who were all dressed with at least a hint of Eurotrash- heavy on the ascots and flowing silk scarves.  I suddenly suspected that we had sat down to a meal that was going to cost more than what we had intended.

So I did the dumbest, most embarrassing, Ugly-American thing I’d done in a while- I interrupted our waiter and asked how much the meals he had listed actually cost (no prices had been mentioned).  He paused, gave us the prices in pesos, and said he’d come back to take our orders in a minute.  Meanwhile, I did some math and realized we were talking about $30 a plate- not something I’d bat an eye at for a nice meal in Seattle or LA, but in the land of $3 ceviche, it suddenly seemed REALLY expensive.

While we debated whether or not we wanted to really complete the embarrassment and leave, the table next to us got our food.  Mike took one look at the feast in front of them and told me to stay in my seat, order whatever I wanted and get some wine for good measure.  I was confused.  And then I remembered- my husband is a whore for lobster.

So here is what the most expensive meal in Tulum looks like:

the complementary meze platter. love at first sight.

my grilled prawns. heaven.

the lobster that stole mike's heart. magic amazing seafood bliss.

Seriously, if you are ever in Tulum and you want an amazing meal, go to Posada Margherita.  Eat pasta in Mexico without shame.  Yum.

After spending $70 on dinner on Saturday, we ate for $8 on Sunday.  And it was super good too, if not a tad more authentic.

if this face doesn't say happy (or homicidal maniac) i don't know what does

This post encompasses everything that is good about vacation food.

Ok, I have one more post to share about our vacation, and then it’s back to pictures of gray skies.  I promise.

Well, we weren’t actually on an island, and the beaches weren’t technically deserted (except once), but that’s how we felt most of the time on the beach last week.  See for yourself:

Ugh.  I want to go back.  Now.

The beaches in Tulum are GORGEOUS.  White sands, dramatic skies, clear water…  and this October, they were practically empty.

Looking at some of these pictures, I almost can’t believe we were actually there.  But we were.  I have proof.

I almost look tan!

this is how mike found relief from his 10,000 mosquito bites

See the bikes?  That’s how we got to the beach.  Note that my bike has a completely flat front tire.  I didn’t notice this until we had already rode half a mile, when I almost broke down in tears because it was SO hard to ride the freaking bike and I assumed that the only explanation was that I suddenly in the worst possible shape ever.  Mike switched bikes with me, immediately realized that the tire was busted, and then rode the broken bike back to get one with a functional tire.  (It was super chivalrous, but don’t worry, he still made fun of the me the rest of the way).

That particular beach trip must have been cursed though, because on the way back, Mike’s chain broke and we had to walk the bikes back.  It was dark and there were about 284,283,573 mosquitoes out and they all bit Mike.  I even got a few bites, and I am the person who brags about being “immune” to mosquitoes.  Dumb.

Thank god there is one foolproof cure for mosquito bites.

And all was right with the world.

After the cenote, we were both starving, and since we were heading towards Akumel, our guide’s home town, we asked him to take us somewhere where HE wanted to eat.

Victor chose well.

the best guacamole EVER.

mike's carnitas and victor's chicken fajitas. the restaurant was out of beef.

my ceviche- shrimp, octopus, fish and MORE avocado. mmmmm...

i LOVED this sign.

So after you eat a gigantic lunch, what’s better than showing off your bloated belly in a swimsuit?  Thankfully, the turtles we swam with didn’t seem to be too judgey.

Turtles weren’t the only thing we saw…

Stingrays are way to pretty to be so dangerous.  We didn’t know that they would be around, and as soon as I saw one, I had flashbacks to Vietnam and swam straight over to Mike to make sure he wasn’t having any post-traumatic-stress-disorder attacks.  (Addendum: Mike got bitten by a mystery sea creature on our honeymoon, which resulted in a 3 day stay in a rural hospital and his near death.  We don’t actually know what bit/stung/attacked him, but we both harbor some anxiety in the face of any poisonous aquatic creatures.)  (Stupid second addendum: Mike also has extra hatred for sting rays because he is still sad about the Crocodile Hunter dying.)

At this point, I wanted to see more sea life, so Victor took us to a lagoon where the fresh cenote water meets the salty ocean water.  It was possibly the most peaceful place I’ve ever been.

Victor said he was taking us somewhere where there were a lot of fish.  This was a VERY accurate description.

I spent most of the afternoon in the water.

Mike was tired, so he made friends with the nice 84-year-old British woman we met.  While I bonded with fish, he bonded with her- evidently she was on vacation with her son and daughter and law, who were snorkeling.  She lives in northern England and went to Egypt in January.  I think that now they’re penpals or something.

After I was completely raisin-ifed, we piled back in the car and left the lagoon.  We dropped Victor off at his house, which he had just finished building (I’m still pissed I didn’t take a good picture of us with him) and waved at his kids. Then we finally headed back to the hotel.

Next up: margaritas, broken bicycles, and LOTS of mosquitoes.

Thursday we woke up bright and early for our day of activity.  Tulum (and most of the Yucutan peninsula) is known for being ripe with all kinds of adventure friendly action- you can go snorkeling in sea caves called cenotes, see all kinds of awesome jungle and sea creatures, check out the canopy via zipline and explore Mayan ruins.  Rather than joining up with a group tour, we took advantage of the low season and found a flexible company called Edventure Tours, who set us up with a guide named Victor and an underwater camera.  Here are some of the best pictures from our liquid adventures:

First, we went ziplining.  This wasn’t exactly UNDER the sea, but rather, OVER a lagoon.  So water was involved.  and there is a picture of me hanging upside down.

This lagoon, like most of the places we went that day, were small pieces of land still owned and run by local Mayan tribes.  There are several other large cenotes and activity centers that are privately owned (the tribes sold off the land way too cheaply before the Yucutan became a big tourist mecca).  The big ones probably have more decorations and fancier accessories, but I liked the fact that our money went somewhere less gross than a big Disney-esque company.  I grew up in Orange County and own a house in Anaheim- Disney already has enough of my lifetime income.  Plus, it was pretty awesome to be able to get to talk to everybody one-on-one like this.

Suiting up.

Victor preps the ziplines.

You love the “brake” right?  Super high tech.

Mike looks more confident.

I think it’s obvious who does all the work in our relationship.

Return transportation.

After the high-flyin’ adventure we went for a quick swim with Victor.

Next, we headed to Cenote Dos Ojos, a nearby sea cavern.  There really are no words for how cool it was.

Dopeness

Next: turtles, sting rays, guacamole and the elderly.